“It’s all good. Life’s perfect! The sun cannot shine any brighter than it already is shining. Look around yourself, Everything is so beautiful.” An everyday exchange of dialogue between my head and my conscious. What else do i want? My life don’t suck. I have everything i wanted, Everything i ever dreamt of, Everything i wished for. But this is just the start. When the morning ritual comes to an end that’s when the cracks show up on this “beautiful” castle of glass. Come afternoon and the annoying phase begins. “Why isn’t this in the right place? Just who the hell is he to tell me what to do? Oh My god! Why is there so much traffic? Why is the sun blasting heat like it’s some kind of a furnace? Just what the hell is wrong with this weather?” Understandable. Might have been a long day. Or maybe just maybe i was complaining about the right things. As much as i try to convince myself i should’ve known i was wasting my time and should’ve started praying that it was the end of it, but my god was i so wrong. Sun is setting and the evening begins. That’s when the monsters start showing up. “Is someone following me back home? Are the cops gonna stop me for speeding? Did i just commit a hit and run? Why are my co workers so ignorant? Is my boss blind for not seeing and praising me for the work i did? Just who the fuck are these people and why the fuck am i taking orders from them huh?” Jesus Christ if only you gave me the ability to stop things before reaching the breaking point, but nope you cunning bastard you had to push me didn’t you? Night settles and that’s when the paranoia kicks in and of course that son of a bitch is overdosed with insomnia because why the hell not! A state of dread so high that saying i am jaded inside would be an understatement! “Is someone trying to kill me? Why am i living alone in my house? I had a dog with me didn’t i? You know what? I have had enough with these assholes, i am gonna kill these fuckers now!” I get up to get my gun but manage to stop myself, like the whole world is pulling me away from this madness. I lie down. Push the pillow right down my ears and force myself to sleep.

Next morning i wake up, feeling as positive as anything can be. I get over with my morning ritual and in due course of time find myself in the same loop. I push myself harder and am able to get over with the day. Another day begins but the same cycle repeats. Same thing happens the day after and the day after that and the week after that and the month after that. The moment i started believing that i got used to it was the moment the true colors of me being a dumb ass fool started revealing themselves.  You see, as much as i thought i am used to it now there was but one thing that i somehow managed to ignore and that was the voices were becoming louder and louder everyday. It started feeling like the voices were me, as they slowly started taking control my actions. The Schizophrenia was real. But i still kept winning this battle against my mind. Until today. I leave my house to buy some groceries without any clue that i was packing my gun with me. In the parking lot i go near my car that’s when all hell breaks loose. I see my neighbour, real nice chap, who came near me to say hi. I don’t know what i heard or what i made of it but instead of responding i punch him right in his face. It felt like he was threatening me or maybe even insulting me. Before he could say anything i punch him again and again till he loses a few of his teeth and his mouth started bleeding. With zero control of my self i pull out my gun and aim it at his carcass. But somehow, right at that very moment, my eyes open knowing that i have taken it too far this time, i see myself aiming a gun at me. I am baffled. Shock isn’t something that can define this moment. Scared and confused i ask the unarmed me “Who are you?”And his response leaves me shellshocked. “I am you. The REAL you. I am also the guy whom you are pointing a gun at. I am also each and every single person whom you have known or not known. But i am the real them. I am the one you lock in the deepest, darkest place in your conscious. I am the one you don’t want your friends and family to see. I am the one who hides behind your 5000$ suit like a shadow, the one who is the opposite of class in your parties where you drink expensive champagne. Kid. I am the one by whom you are so scared that you decide to lock me away in a chest in some far away corner of your soul and forget about the key. But don’t be scared because after all i am YOU. The true you. And this time i broke free of that chest and have no plans to go back inside.” I hear him and then i look at my neighbour, tears dripping from his eyes saying “please don’t do this” while the “real” me stands right in front of my barrel and screams “DO IT!” Emotion, confusion, turmoil. It feels like the weight of the whole world is on my shoulders. I resist. I insist. But after a long period talking to myself. I pull the trigger.



Totally a work of fiction.



A 100 different languages and a thousand different accents and yet there is one thing in common. Connectivity. People connect on a daily basis with each other not just in their local vicinity but all across the world irrespective of their race, gender, caste, creed or religion. And yet words are the most lethal weapon there is. Among every language that is used on this planet English is the one thing that acts as our bridge language or the “lingua franca”. People who belong from places where english is not spoken on a daily basis let alone is necessary, learn and practice how to speak because they feel that it’ll make them feel more connected which is true by the way or maybe it has become an accepted reality at this point. But the beauty of language lies beyond the confines of English. The softness of Urdu or the cutthroat feeling of Spanish. The rigidity of Russian or the sexiness of Italian. The true beauty and connectivity lies in all these languages whether they are spoken by you or not. When you roam in the streets of Italy and hear the word “pizza” thats the very moment when you truly understand the emotion of pizza which can and is not conveyed by your local dominos or when a Russians talks about vodka, in that very moment you feel the intoxication that you will get induced with if you ever decide to consume said vodka. That’s where my point kicks in, all of these beautiful moments can and should be savoured(which they are sometimes) but instead lead up to unwanted violence, inherited racism and sexism and most importantly accent and origin superiority.


Ever wondered why we wage all these countless wars? Or why our so developed society is on the brink of collapse? We put the blame on others instead of going through our very own problems. We point fingers towards the other end of the spectrum instead of mending our own. When two countries collide with each other it’s not because of something that the prior did or something that the latter was victim of. It’s because of words that were exchanged between them that left a scar in their minds and hearts. Words are more sharp than the thorn of a rose. They can penetrate through something which is impenetrable by a .45. Words can kill they are most highly advanced and future proof weapon. More deadlier than an atomic bomb and they funny thing is everyone has equal and all rights to them and you definitely don’t need the second amendment to use them. A modern society is not one that has world dominance or is the origin of the lingua franca but is one that supports all sorts of immigration. That’s where true power lies. People tend to live in ghettos instead of merging into the society they opt and thats where the division begins and moving forward everything rips itself apart and the world starts burning. It’s good to have a bridge language and for us on earth it’s English but it’s even better to explore beyond the horizon every once in a while.

The world will be a much more joyous and happy place if we know how to turn this annihilating weapon into a canon that shoots rainbows, cats and unicorns. Free the world not by taking men’s lives but by taking their tongues(not literally). Don’t force someone into learning some language that they don’t want to. Don’t make them change the way they speak. Don’t tear them away from their origin and make them speak your language. As us human beings are more then capable of getting ourselves out of situations and always feel connected in our own way. We don’t need a change in our thoughts, personalities and how we see right and wrong based on the opinion of some other society.

“Sans Lingua Franca the world will be torn asunder and then it shall be free.” Which is true if you give it thought but isn’t necessary. Atleast for now.


*Inspired by Metal Gear and Hideo Kojima san.



“A kernel panic, also known as computer death or PC death, is an action taken by an operating system upon detecting an internal fatal error from which it cannot safely recover.”

” Begin: Mounting root file system…  …

/init: /init: 151: syntax error:  0xforce=panic

Kernel panic – not syncing: Attempted to kill init!

That was the very definition of KP and below that was what possibly what the error screen will show you if  your system undergoes KP.

But is it what you see when you und3rg0 a kernel panic?

I know that question doesn’t make much sense as i cl3arly am talking about computers here and asking if it happens to you. But th1nk it through. Just because ‘kernel’ is attached to ‘panic’ it possibly cann0t mean it is limited to a c0mput3r.  At the end of the day we(humans) are no d1ff3rent from these machines.

This term fa5cinat3s me so much that i figured we can talk about it. But the twist is, instead of talking bout a computers kernel panic lets talk about 0urs.

Ever b33n in a situation that sw00p the ground from under your feet? Or a situation filled with embarrassment or f3ar? Say no, and i found a liar. We all have been there, at least once at some point in our l1fe. I, for sure have been there a m1lli0n times. And whenever that happens to us, no matter how big or 5mall it is, it takes time for us to recover from it doesn’t it? That’s our version of kernel panic, sorta. It’s that time period be7w3en that moment and us recovering from that moment. The stage where all hell breaks lose for atleast a 5pl1t  second and our system reb00ts itself to get back to it’s normal state.

Think about all the people who have been sc4rr3d by something that happened to them or something that they did. People who are 5uic1dal  or on the brink of collapse. We simply pat their 5hould3rs and claim that “they are going through a tough time” but the truth is that an internal fatal error was tr1gger3d  in them which led them to a state from which they cannot easily be r3c0ver3d. Thus, a kernel panic. it can be from anything, problem in their m0ral code(internal system issue) or through an external f0rce(a virus) which led them to this blue screen of d3ath(panic). Now, when your system undergoes something like this you tr4ck its source and depending on the source you resolve it either by yourself or through the help of an engineer or a h4cker. But which hacker or engineer helps us when we go thr0ugh the same situation? None. And that’s the beauty of it. The c0nfigurat1on within us is so advance that after living under a r0ck for a bit it reboots itself automatically. Ain’t that fa5cinat1ng? And for those who couldn’t make through it (god bless them) is probably b3c4use they were due for a software update. We have all our friends and families to help us through t1m3s like that but our recovery doesn’t happen because of their g00dw1ll but because of us realising that it’s time for us to drop the charades and 5tand back up. It’s because of us processing and logging all of that data into a server and making that s5erv3r our own honeypot. When the motherboard collapses it still has the support of the other h4rdwar3 but that support doesn’t do much for it now does it? We ourself are our engineers or hackers. We f1x ourselves. So, don’t worry if you have something within y0urs3lf that scares or embarrasses or kills you. No matter how dark or light it may be it’s upt0 you to fix it and not run away from it. That’s the only difference between these m4ch1n3s and us, an external force fixes theirs, where as we fix our own kernel panic. So don’t be 5car3d. Shut down your system, r3b00t it, update your software and trust me you’ll be good to go k1dd0.

At the end of the day, one difference doesn’t make us all that d1ff3rent  from these beloved m4ch1nes of ours. Does it?


This is not something original, it’s just an initiative that’s trying to come to light and in my opinion should find its right spot as it’s very important. So I am writing my opinion towards it.

Dear parents,

I know you want your kid to shine bright in his/her future and I know that you worry over the fact “what if he/she doesn’t  make it then what will happen?” But your kid is also worried about that and this fact is quite simply ignored. Exams are approaching/ongoing and kids of all ages are working their assess off to get a good grade. What’s at fault is that them trying is not enough. For you.

Blaming them for not doing good the last time or asking them to study for 10 hours a day is not a solution or is it? In your vision it might be but what you are forgetting is that the kid that you raised has a life and that he/she is also a living breathing creature who can feel. I know your worries are reasonable, that too in a time and age where competition is an ever present reality but having faith in your kid is the one and only solution, not accusing them or suppressing them. You do realise that he/she follows whatever you say because he/she is so petrified by you that even the thought of saying no or questioning your choice or even giving their opinion on what you told them send shivers down their spine instead of them liking what you say. They just do it because they feel helpless.

You don’t hesitate for a second to tell them that your friends or neighbours kids did something better than what they are doing and find it a means of motivating them but the truth is you are demotivating them and simply underestimating them. They already know that they are not doing that great so please STOP pointing their mistakes if you cannot rectify them by holding their hands. Screaming, shouting or even telling them that “you are gonna destroy yourself if you keep going like this” is not a step that’s  taking them in the right direction it’s just spoiling their mood, your mood and most importantly the atmosphere of your house.How much time do you actually give them? How many hours a day do you spend with them talking about them and their lives? How comfortable they are with you? Have you asked yourself these questions? The kid you have in your house probably feels like he/she lives with a stranger. They might have a hidden talent like painting or singing or dancing or even something far more amazing and uncommon and may want to show that to you but doesn’t  because you cannot stop choking them with studies. Your kid can’t even build up a nerve to ask you to get him/her something that you can and will get him because he/she is Unknown to what he/she will get as a response.

Particularly in a country like ours there’s a very stupid and funny myth turned custom that the minute the child comes to life and is a boy, his parents declare he’ll be an engineer and if is a girl, then she’ll be a doctor. Seriously? The child doesn’t even know how to say “mom” or “dad” and you decide  his profession? You didn’t even bother asking him/her? What if he/she doesn’t want to do that? Or what if he/she is not capable of doing that? Then what? You’ll scream at them, scold them or disown them? Just because they can’t or don’t want to do what you want them to do? Don’t set expectation for your kids without giving your 100% towards helping them executing YOUR expectations. Perhaps, don’t set expectations for them AT ALL! Let them set their own expectations. Let them have their own targets/goals. And if you end up setting those expectations for them, then please also be ready to get disappointed. They are thankful and grateful that you take great care of them and put their needs and demands first. So if they respect you so much please respect them back too. They have sleepless nights, they feel suffocated, they don’t feel like themself when all this pressure from you is being forced on them. You tell them “do well in life, stand tall make yourself proud” but the truth is YOU ARE MAKING YOURSELF PROUD THROUGH THEM and you don’t actually give a damn about them even if you put a lot of hard work on them.

Kids these days are smart enough  to distinguish between right and wrong and they know what works for them and what doesn’t. They also know how to get the best out of themselves. Yes, there are those who do nothing and get drifted to the dark side of life and literally waste their time doing nothing and grow up way before their age but those kids are  spotted from a mile away. If your kid wants a bright future he/she will work towards it without a doubt. He/she will not venture into the dark side. Trust them. Yes they want to watch TV or play video games or go out in the park. Let them go and enjoy. They’ll finish their work a few hours late but they will finish it. It’s their age to enjoy so let them enjoy also. Perhaps you stopping them from doing all this is what takes them to the bad side and may even give birth to hatred towards you which may last for the rest of their life. Don’t tell me you want to lose your kid forever just over not letting him/her play in the park for a few extra hours. You want to direct their life but you end up dictating their life unknowingly or purposely, I don’t know. Stop telling them that they cannot do it and start saying “yes you can!”. Stop comparing them with someone else and let them be their own entity. Stop making choices for them and let them make their own choices. Stop scaring them and start talking to them and make them feel less like a stranger and more like a family member which they actually are. And most importantly STOP EXPECTING FROM THEM AND START BELIEVEING IN THEM.

The purpose of education is not to score good marks or get us good jobs but is a means to make us a better human being. And if we are a good enough human being then nothing, and I mean NOTHING in this world can stop us from being what we want.

This is not to each and every single parent out there. But hey! please understand us as the schools, collages and our education system denies to do so. You are our only ray of light in this dark tunnel so please don’t get blocked by the rocks. The one and only thing we respect and love the most in our life is YOU and are honoured, grateful and lucky to have parents like you but please trust us.

Thank you.


A kid who’s is trying his best to make his mother proud and has definitely faced/is facing almost all these problems in his life.